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    Written by: Bruce Hancock   Produced by: Posie Jacobs   Directed by: Gaye Arnold

Back at the country house, Beryl is serving up some cookies when Craig and Debbie walk in. She tells them that they're just in time for the tasting. Craig just stands there, though, and mutters that he doesn't feel like it. Debbie explains to Beryl, "We found Ruby - down St. Kilda Esplanade. She wasn't exactly what he was hoping." Andy walks in from the hallway. Craig immediately walks out. Debbie goes to follow, but Beryl suggests to her quickly that she leave him. Debbie sighs that she wishes she could do something. She goes on sadly, "You should have seen his face when he saw his mother. She was horrible; really nasty. Would've been better if we'd never found her at all - at least then he could have kept imagining she was nice."

In the lounge room, Craig turns off the TV and sits down. Andy joins him and comments, "Heard about Ruby. Bad luck, eh? Still, you know, I can't say I'm surprised - I told you she'd be a loser." He sits down. Craig just mutters, "Doesn't bother me." Beryl comes in with a tray of tea thing for Craig as Andy continues, "It would bother me - finding out my mum was a dog. It's pretty hard to explain that to your friends - especially girls." Craig suddenly leaps up and yells furiously, "Why don't you shut your mouth?" Beryl suggests to Andy tersely, "I think Craig can do without your company at the moment, Andy. In fact, if that's the way you're carrying on, I think we can all do without it." Andy muses, "I was only trying to help." Beryl glares at him and says, "Andy, I don't know what's got into you lately, but I don't like it. That cruise seems to have gone to your head. Unless you change your attitude, young man, you can find somewhere else to stay." Andy murmurs, "Maybe I have been a bit rough." Looking at Craig, he mutters, "I'm sorry if I hassled you." He then walks out. Beryl follows him, leaving Craig sitting on the couch, looking upset.

Charlie and Bjorn head into the mansion, Charlie laughing as they do so that she gets seasick in a bathtub! Janice joins them in the corridor and Charlie tells her that she's just bringing the new tenant back. She adds that Bjorn's been showing her over his ship - it was wonderful! Bjorn asks Janice where he pays his deposit. Janice points to Fiona's room and he walks off. When he's gone, Charlie smiles at Janice, "Isn't he divine?!" Janice, though, retorts, "To be honest, I think he's rather smarmy." She then bends down and goes on, "He's certainly not tidy - dumping his suitcases where everyone can fall over them." She goes to pick them up - only one of them is open and several bottles, watches and other items fall out. Janice picks up one watch and reads an inscription 'To Bjorn, love from Louise'. She picks up another and reads, To Bjorn, all my love, Nicole.' She then exclaims in horror, "They're all from women. He's nothing more than a gigolo. Charlie insists, "He's obviously very popular." Janice growls that the presents are all quite expensive. Charlie, though, snaps, "They're not payments - they're gifts." With that, she storms off to Bjorn's room.

In Fiona's room, Fiona hands Bjorn his receipt. He thanks her and then tells her to let him know if there's anything he can do for her. Fiona says hesitantly, "I'm worried about Janice." Bjorn asks what's wrong. Fiona explains, "She fell head over heels for an English fellow who was staying here, and unfortunately he didn't feel the same way, and she was really very hurt." Bjorn begins to ask, "Do you want me--?" Fiona interrupts him quickly and replies, "No, no, no, no, no! I just want you to pass her a compliment every once so often. I don't want her falling in love again; I just want her to see that there are other men in the world." Bjorn smiles, "How can I say 'no' to you?!"

It's nighttime, and Janice is setting the table in Fiona's room. Fiona brings a bottle of wine in from the kitchen. There's suddenly a knock on the door and Fiona goes and opens it to find Bjorn standing there, wearing a tuxedo. She invites him in and explains to Janice that she's going to introduce him gently to the hectic mansion social life! She then heads off to the kitchen to get a corkscrew and nibblies. When she's gone, Bjorn hands Janice a small box. It contains a bottle of perfume and he tells her, "I chose it especially: the aroma seemed to suit you - strong and soft." Janice, though, hands it back to him and retorts, "If you're trying to notch up another victory, forget it; I'm not accepting it." Looking surprised, Bjorn takes the box and puts it down on the table. He then goes and winds up the gramophone and places the needle on the record that's on there. It's the one Janice was playing to console herself about Neville. As the tune starts playing, she glares at Bjorn in horror and snaps, "Take that off. You've got no right to play that song." She dashes over to the gramophone and removes the needle. She then growls at Bjorn, "I don't care how many women have fallen for you. Don't treat me the same way - I'm selective about the people I care for." Bjorn murmurs, "I'm sorry if I have offended you." Janice snaps, "You have. Please leave." Bjorn sighs and then calls to the kitchen, "Goodbye, Fiona. Thankyou." He then tells Janice, "Whatever I did, it wasn't intentional." He goes. Fiona emerges from the kitchen and asks in surprise what happened. Janice retorts, "I asked him to go. Please - I don't want to talk about it. Let's just have dinner." Fiona stands there, looking perplexed.

Sometime later, Bjorn is at Charlie's. She hands him a drink but apologises for it not being from a proper ship's decanter. Bjorn raises his glass to her and proposes, "Cheers."

At the mansion, Fiona offers Janice half a glass of wine. Janice refuses, though, leaving Fiona to smile that she'll have to drink it all on her own! Janice growls that she could re-cork it and put it back in the 'fridge. Fiona sighs heavily and asks, "Will you tell me what's wrong? I feel as though I'm having dinner in a crematorium!" Janice retorts, "It's Bjorn: I can't stand him." Fiona asks in surprise what he's done. Janice snaps, "Bought me a bottle of perfume." As Fiona laughs bemusedly, she goes on, "He wants to add another victim to his list. The man's compulsive - and now you're telling me he's having dinner with Charlie." Fiona laughs, "Just because a man gives you a present doesn't mean that he's trying to seduce you. He probably saw that you were down in the dumps and just wanted to cheer you up a bit." Janice, though, retorts, "You didn't see what was inside his carry-bag. He had about 25 different watches from about 25 different women - and that's only the watches." Fiona sighs, "You are so naive. It is possible to have lady friends without sleeping with them." Janice mutters, "He's not interested in friendship. I hope Charlie wakes up to him." Fiona insists, "Charlie is not about to jump into bed with a married man." Janice stares at her in surprise and repeats, "Married?" Fiona explains, "Not as we know it - they call it an 'open marriage': his wife doesn't mind if he goes out with other women." Janice tuts, "How disgusting." Fiona tells her, "It might sound strange to us, but they're happy; that's all that matters." Janice snaps, "It is not. I bet he doesn't tell Charlie he's married." Fiona stands up suddenly and mutters in frustration, "Honestly. You just refuse to see another person's point of view, don't you?" She heads off to the kitchen. Janice suddenly heads out, leaving Fiona to return to an empty room. She looks around in surprise and then shrugs.

Sometime later, Charlie opens her front door to find Janice standing there. She marches in and demands, "I want to see Bjorn." Charlie tries to protest that they're having dinner. Janice, though, repeats that she wants to see him. She stomps into the lounge room and snaps at Bjorn - who's sitting on the couch - "You ought to be ashamed of yourself. I don't suppose you've even considered how all your girlfriends would feel if they knew about you." Bjorn stands up and asks, "What are you talking about?" Janice glares at him and snaps, "How you can look your wife in the face is beyond me." Charlie turns to her in surprise and mouths, "Wife?" Janice retorts, "That's right: you're having dinner with an adulterer." Charlie looks at Bjorn and asks in shock, "Is that true?" Bjorn tells her, "Yes, I am married, but my wife knows exactly what I do. It's no secret." Charlie, looking upset, asks quietly, "Why didn't you tell me?" Bjorn assures her, "If it seemed we were going to get involved, I would have. I'm not deceitful." Janice growls, "The point is, you are married and you're still having affairs. It's despicable." Bjorn retorts, "Just because you lost your Englishman is no reason to stop other people enjoying themselves. My private life is none of your business." Janice snaps, "That's got nothing to do with it." Charlie says to her quietly, "Please, Janice, would you leave? I'd like to talk to Bjorn alone." Janice mutters, "Alright - but if you keep seeing him, Charlie, I'm going to be very disappointed."

A few minutes later, Charlie is standing by her drinks table. Bjorn tells her to sit down again and they can enjoy their port. Charlie, though, sighs, "I wish it was that simple." Bjorn gasps, "You don't agree with that... fanatic?" Charlie replies, "Not completely, but I do have rules about men. Only two: they have to be under ninety! - and single." Bjorn protests, "You don't understand. My wife doesn't mind--" Charlie interrupts and retorts, "Your wife mightn't, but I do. I'm sorry." Bjorn stands up and sighs, "Very well - although I wish you'd let me explain." Charlie tells him, "I think I've heard enough for one night, thankyou very much." Bjorn tells her, "It was a very lovely dinner. Thankyou." With that, he walks out.

The next morning, Beryl puts a tray of breakfast things down in front of David in the lounge room at the country house. He has a folder of papers in front of him, and he tells Beryl that he'll only have time for the tea: the first run starts in an hour and he's got to whip round and see Doug before that. Beryl murmurs, "I wish you'd change your mind." David insists, "It's going to be alright." Beryl retorts, "If it was timber, I wouldn't worry, but nitroglycerine...?" David assures her, "Nothing is going to happen. I'm a good driver." Beryl asks, "What about the other drivers on the road? Some of them are crazy; you can't control them." She then goes on, "I've been thinking about Robert: if you have an accident..." David insists, "I'm doing it for you and Robert, to build security. As soon as I have, I'll stop. I promise." Beryl warns him, "Be careful."

Just outside the back door, Andy has replaced the corrugated iron panelling that hid the view with some trellis. Debbie emerges from the house and Andy asks her what she thinks. She smiles, "Very nice." Andy then asks how Craig is. Debbie sighs, "Alright." She then enthuses, "He's had this great idea for the shopping mall: a happy hour at the ice-cream parlour. It's going to be wonderful!" Andy, sounding disinterested, asks, "Oh yeah? What's the point?" Debbie explains, "The kids bring their parents in and the parents starts shopping." Andy muses, "Sounds a bit iffy to me." Debbie smiles, "I bet it works."

David is standing in Doug's hotel room, telling him, "It should take about five hours, depending on the traffic. There's another load tomorrow; I don't know how quickly they're going to pay up." Doug, who has a pile of paperwork in front of him, just retorts, "If they're slow with the bills, David, chase them. See you when you get back." David hesitates and then says, "Listen, mate, I don't mind starting off with a couple of loads of nitro, but I don't want to make a habit of it, OK?" Doug sighs, "If you haven't got the guts to haul it, David, you'd better stop wasting our time; find some other way of paying me back." David snaps, "It's got nothing to do with guts." Doug, though, just asks lightly, "No?" David glares at him and growls, "Alright. I'll call you tonight." He walks out.

Sometime later, David is standing by his truck, preparing it for its journey. A sign is attached to the back, saying 'Caution. Highly Dangerous Load." Beryl emerges from the country house, carrying Robert, and watches in concern as David climbs into the driver's cab, starts the engine, closes the door and then pulls away.

Charlie opens the front door of her house to find Bjorn standing there. He hands her a small gift and explains that it's an apology for last night. He then tells her, "I'm afraid you might have the wrong impression of me." Charlie replies, "Darling, the only thing wrong with you is you're married." Bjorn tells her, "That's what I wanted to explain. It's not like other marriages; there's more to it than you think - or less, to be accurate." Charlie assures him, "I'm not angry." Bjorn, however, insists, "Still, I'd feel better if you knew the full story. I want you to understand." Charlie stares at him and then smiles and invites him in.

A short time later, out by the pool at the back of the house, Bjorn is showing Charlie some photos and he points out his wife, Kirsten, and his three children. Charlie tells him that they're very good looking. Bjorn explains that Kirsten is a housewife who's perfectly happy to stay at home with the children - that's where they're different. He goes on, "Don't misunderstand me: we are also very close - but more as friends than lovers. You know, we were married at 17. Too young. She was very quiet and I thought I'd change and settle down, too. By 21, we had three children, but I still wanted to go somewhere... go out... see people... things... Kirsten didn't and she didn't know what to think, so we talked about it and decided it was better to let each other do what we wanted. You have to understand, Charlie, I didn't have my first affair until after that first decision. I've never cheated." Charlie murmurs, "I suppose I rather jumped to conclusions, didn't I?" Bjorn smiles, "Don't worry - everyone does. But my family's happy. So, I hope now you know, you will start spending more time with me again...?" Charlie muses, "Now look who's jumping to conclusions." She then goes on, "Darling, I can understand your arrangements - and I can respect it - but I'm not going to be one of your affairs." Bjorn points out, "Two people spending time together don't have to be having an affair. They can be friends." Charlie smiles at him and murmurs, "OK."

Sometime later, Charlie is laughing as she and Bjorn head up to the front door of the mansion. They've been shopping and Charlie laughs in delight as she hands Bjorn a toy koala.

A few moments later, Charlie and Bjorn waltz into Fiona's room and Bjorn, holding out his koala, says to Fiona in a strangulated Australian accent, "G'day!" Fiona laughs, "Charlie, what on earth have you done to him?!" Charlie explains, "I've been taking him sightseeing!" Bjorn enthuses, "It was marvellous!" Janice suddenly walks in and, ignoring Charlie and Bjorn, tells Fiona curtly, "I've come to pay my rent." Bjorn, though, says, "Janice, if you're still upset about--" Janice interrupts and snaps, "I don't want to talk about it." Charlie insists, "Bjorn's explained everything, darling." Janice just retorts, "I'm sure he has, but I don't want to talk about it with either of you." Charlie shrugs, "Fair enough." With that, she tells Fiona that she'll see her later and she and Bjorn head out. When they've gone, Fiona tells Janice, "You really ought to give Bjorn a chance. You'd like him." Janice, though, retorts, "What I'd like is for you to stop meddling in my affairs." Fiona insists, "I'm only trying to help." Janice yells, "You think telling the world about my feelings for Neville is helping?" Fiona assures her, "I only told Bjorn." Janice yells, "You had no right to; he's a complete stranger." Fiona tells her, "I just thought he might be able to cheer you up." Janice, though, retorts, "I don't find compulsive gigolos particularly cheerful, and I certainly don't want them knowing about my private life." With that, she storms out. Fiona calls after her that she's forgotten her receipt. Janice shouts angrily, "Put it under my door."

Andy is sitting with Doug in his hotel room. Doug is looking at a folder of figure and he murmurs, "Very interesting." There's suddenly a knock on the door and Doug calls, "Come in." The door opens to reveal Craig standing there. He steps inside and tells Doug, "I've written out a few ideas for the mall. I just wondered if you'd like to read through them." He hands Doug a folder. Andy sits there, holding his lip as Doug reads through Craig's proposals quickly. Doug then comments, "No flies on you blokes, are there?" Craig asks him in surprise, "What do you mean?" Doug indicates Andy and replies, "Your mate here's just done the same thing: peddled me an idea about a happy hour in the ice-cream--" Craig interrupts suddenly and, glaring at Andy, roars, "That's mine!" Andy sighs, "Come off it." Craig, though, yells, "Like hell." Turning to Doug, he adds, "He's lying." Turning back to Andy, he snaps, "Go on. Admit it." Andy stands up and warns, "You'd better watch what you say." Craig snaps, "Why? I'm sick of you ripping me off." He goes to lunge at Andy, but Doug quickly steps between them and warns, "Go easy." Craig yells, "He's lying. I swear." Andy retorts, "I'm not lying about anything." Craig snarls, "Look, mate, if you want a fight, come on." Doug looks at the two of them and snaps, "Alright." He then says more calmly, "Look, I'll tell you what I'll do: I'll arrange a little contest; sort out the sheep from the goat. You guys wait here for a second." He heads off to one of the other rooms in his suite, adding warily as he does so, "Neutral corners, OK?" He leaves the room. When he's gone, Craig warns Andy, "You're going to come a cropper now, sport." Andy, though, retorts, "You reckon? There's more than one way to win a test, mate. You know, I wouldn't get too cocky, if I were you..."

 

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